…and then I think he got shot in our alley.
People! Shots again last night! What the?!
Shaun and I were making sandwiches in the kitchen and I heard a shot (ring out? Why does that sound too pleasant?) I looked out the window to the alley (as I was heading to turn out the light in my office) and saw flashes of light that corresponded with each shot (as if from a gun). I was actually scared this time…it was no less than 100 feet from me behind our back gate. By the time I called 311 they had already received a handful of calls and patrol cars were on the way. We never saw a patrol car, although I can’t say I spent much time at the window after that.
Sigh. I am, at some level, so tired of living here. It is awful to be afraid…not only of what happens around me, but then afraid of the way(s) I feel about it. I don’t want fear to define me as a person.
Shaun and I were talking recently about The Wire, a show that we have really gotten into over the last couple of years. Great comments and reviews of it here, here, and here. It’s set in Baltimore, which is close enough to DC that we can draw certain parallels. I am definitely more aware, since watching this show, of drug activity that goes on on my block. And, I am more afraid. Of my African American neighbors. There, I said it. Damnit! Not of Willa at the Safeway, or Eddie next door, but of the late-teen, early-twenties groups of black guys (and gals! Don’t kid yourself, watch The Wire!) that hang out at the corners and flash hand signs to each other and then walk, quickly, with their folded newspapers to passing cars for hand-offs.
We’ve even said we need to stop watching this show. My fears build and become more irrational every week. Will we get caught in a shoot-out over some deal-gone-bad? Will a junkie needing money shove me into my house and beat me up for money or stuff when I’m getting the mail? Will someone need my car to get away one day as I am pulling in with groceries and my daughter!? I can’t even think about it.
Don’t get me wrong, I know there are scary people everywhere. And, we are moving to Colorado! Home of Columbine and this other recent debacle involving a school shooting. So, that takes care of it! Instead of being shot by a black hoodlum in our alley, Ruby can get shot by a white nut-job at her school. Or, we could escape it all and move to Amish country. Aaaaaaahhh!
Today is definitely one of those days when I will not be watching the news.
And, if I were an African American person, I wonder how I would feel about The Wire? Anyone? Before you write that it’s “just a television show,” the producers have said that they have had to water down some of the violence they observed in the few years they researched and prepared for the show, to be fit for TV.
I think I need to find that big box of Little House on the Prairie videos and heat me up some apple cider. All, of course, done far from the back windows this morning.
Before we went to bed last night, Shaun decided he wasn’t going to take the garbage out after dark anymore. He added “The good thing about this time is that if there are bodies scattered in the alley, they’re in a good spot for trash pick-up.”
Be safe, people.
Rod Stewart, Young Turks (I have no explanation for this other than it won’t stop looping around in my head)